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I'm getting braces. I'm an adult. This is my story.
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11 June 09

I’ll post a more detailed story tomorrow but just a quick update:

Therapy went well and I think it might actually help.

The elastic hurts like hell. I can’t open my mouth. And laughing with elastics is next to impossible.

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8 June 09

It has been a crazy week and shaping up to be even crazier this week.  I have two points to discuss in todays post. One dental related the other not and a preview of things to come (ohhs and ahhs happen now for impending news…)

First the dental stuff.  On Friday I went home early (I work at a university and commencement has all but shut us down, which is sorta nice).  As I was taking the T home (the boston subway for those unfamiliar) I was quite content in my weekend beginning early. I step of the train and start exiting the station when it happens. I see someone smiling and waving at me but my brain isn’t working quick enough to figure it out. I smile. I wave. I say “Hi”.  And then it hits me, its my ortho. In plain clothes (no scrubs or face mask or protective goggles), hair down getting on the escalator.  Now, I understand that she does not wear her scrubs and face mask and protective goggles outside the office but still. It was such a weird experience, like seeing your teacher outside of school when you’re a kid and realizing they don’t actually live at the school.  Now running into her is not that big of a deal except that I am neurotic and sent myself into a mini panic attack of my impending appointment this Thursday.  She single-handedly ruined my afternoon off.*  So, basically I have Dental PTSD. Awesome. Thank goodness my first session with my therapist is the Wednesday before the appointment.

Ok, so the non dental related item, which I am SUPER excited about.  I have decided to train for a 1/2 marathon! Now, this is no small feat for me. I am not a runner. Never have been.  I honestly don’t even think I could run a mile if I tried as of right now. But here I go. I am on an 18 week training schedule (just starting week 2 today) for a marathon on October 11.  My sister mocked me and said I was living the life of a 40 year old divorcee (going to a therapist, doing something big like running a marathon etc.). But I don’t care. As my friend Nick said, 40 year old divorcees do those things because they finally realize how great they are and have the confidence to try new things (paraphrasing a bit). So, I am going with his reasoning, it’s more reassuring.  The greatest thing about the race is that it will be 1 year and 1 month to the day since I got my braces on. So it will be a bit of an F*** you braces you can’t stop me (at least in my head).  When I first got them on I read an article over at Arch Wired that said something along the lines of if you’re upset about the aesthetics do something to improve other parts of you. So, in essence, that’s what I’m doing. When all this is done I’ll not only have awesome teeth (or else someone will be hearing from me) but I will be svelt and a marathon completer. So, I know this is a braces blog but I will periodically be writing about my training because I am so excited about it.

Now, what you can expect from this week:

  • Wednesday - My first therapy session discussing my dental fear
  • Thursday - Ortho appointment where the elastics go in, and god know what ever else they decide to do to me.
  • Saturday - training for a marathon through braces pain? also, other fun braces thoughts that occur after an appointment.

Until then, have a lovely week!

*I know that you control your feelings and no one can ruin your day but you….but she totally ruined my day.

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4 June 09

Made an appointment to speak with an “anxiety specialist”….perhaps I will one day hug my orthodontist like Willy Wonka, or at least not cry every time I’m there.  Baby steps.

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29 May 09

Wanna fight about it?

Yesterday I was at the gym (which I have been frequenting! Yay!).  All was normal.  Except at some point during my eliptical machine workout I cut my bottom lip on my bottom braces.  You see, there are these little hooks on a couple of the brackets where the elastics will eventually clip too and they tend to get caught on my lip (think vampire fang protruding).  I could taste the blood, as one might when they break lip skin, but thought nothing of it because the saliva tends to just neutralize the blood/color of it all.  So I thought.

I finished my hour long work out only to go to the locker room and see that my top braces (clear brackets and elastics) are encrusted covered besmeared in blood.  It looked like I had just been punched in the face by Mike Tyson a couple hundred times.  You know that part in Fight Club where the Narrator (Edward Norton’s character) smiles at his boss and blood comes pouring out? Well, ok, it wasn’t that bad, but pretty close - and way more than is expected to come out of a normal woman’s face on a given normal day.

From now on I shall walk around with boxing gloves on so people just think I am a super bad a** female boxer instead of a dorky twenty-something with braces that cut my face up.

Lastly, here is a female boxer coloring page for your child-like (not child-ish) amusement.

boxing coloring page

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26 May 09

If Demi can laugh at herself….

Demi Moore (whose Twitter I do not follow) apparently posted some pictures of herself missing a tooth.


Demi’s Twit Pic from the Daily Mail

So, If Demi can laugh at her tooth problems and put superficiality aside I guess I can too. This week has done nothing but give me reasons to NOT feel bad about my teeth so I better take all these good vibes and use them!

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24 May 09

I used to teach children. This was before I decided I needed to get my masters degree and get a job that would support my education habit.  So, that’s where I am now - in an office. Well, not right now, but philosophically speaking, you smart internet peoples know what I mean.  Anywho, this weekend while out and about I ran into some of my former students (now in the 8th grade! I had them when they were in 6th! aw.).

Remember running into a teacher when you were a kid? How weird it was that they didn’t just sleep under their desk and were outside and in regular clothing? Yea, well, it is JUST as weird, if not more, for the adults.  Outside the kids seem….older, running around the streets of Boston (just as I did when I was 13 or 14), exposed to the world, being normal people not just “my students”.  Also, it’s like, what do you talk about!? How’s class, homework, your family? It’s just surreal.  It’s not all that bad, in fact it actually feels really good to hear someone scream your name with joy and give you a big hug and tell you they miss you.  I miss them too. I miss teaching.

So, how is this all braces related? Well, the first thing out of thier mouths was “Ms. Stefanie, did you get braces!?” to which I replied with a “why yes i did” and was promplty interrupted to be asked “and did you lose weight?!”.  to which I also replied “yes a bit” and then interrupted again with “you look so GOOD!”.*

One of my kids got his tongue peirced! I noticed right away and proceeded to ask him if his mother knew he did that to which he asked me “Why do have be all up in my mouth’s business”. I wanted to reply “Because you were all up in MY mouth’s business a second ago!” but I didn’t (i’m the grown up, remember!?)

Out of the mouths of babes comes truth.  They have yet to master subtly and lying** skills.  The braces are totally noticeable…but also, apparently, not that important or damaging to my looks.

There you have it, once again my kids teach me way more than I will ever teach them. (Lame to say, but really true.)

*These 4 students happened to be the same 4 that were determined to get me a boyfriend and were often concerend with how I looked so I could properly attract one.

**Lying in terms of “no, you don’t look fat” not “my dog ate my homework and sister suzy was the one who ate the cookie” - there great at the latter type of lying.

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22 May 09
pre-Columbian Mesoamerican Bling. These people willingly had “dentists” drill their teeth to put these jewels in for purely aesthetic reasons. I don’t even trust modern dentists.

pre-Columbian Mesoamerican Bling. These people willingly had “dentists” drill their teeth to put these jewels in for purely aesthetic reasons. I don’t even trust modern dentists.

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18 May 09

My Cartoon Alter Ego

While google’ing around for some braces related material (google searches always make me rethink google searching) I came across something awesome.  My cartoon alter ego.  There is a Nickelodeon cartoon called “The Fairly Odd Parents” about a young boy with two crazy/odd fairy god parents (I know this because I used to teach children…).  Apparently there is a new (or at least new to me) character named Tootie.

Tootie is awesome.  Tootie is braced and a love interest (perhaps forced on the little boys part).  The extra funny part is the  little boy looks like my current non-braced-boyfriend and the little girl looks very similar to me! (I just got my new glasses, and they are purple just like Tootie’s, actually I sort of like them, still feel like an uber-nerd when I have them on: Glasses+Braces*innate awkwardness= Nerd).

So enjoy these picture of Tootie.

Tootie with my favorite food ever!

Tootie and Cake

Tootie being overzealous with the boy. (I may or may not do the same…)

Tootie Kiss

Tootie freaking out - I love the look on his face, I swear this is probably the reaction I get when I too freak out and levitate in my excitement.

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15 May 09
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
— From - really funny site where people post (you guessed it) texts from last night.  I’m amused for 2 reasons, 1) I am known for my inebriated texts and 2) When my bottom braces went on Swine Flu/H1N1 was at its peak in the media and I was almost considering wearing a mask to hide my teeth and say it’s because of the flu outbreak. What can I say, I was desperate.
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12 May 09

Stop messing with my face!

Just got back from my yearly eye appointment and everything is helathy except my vision has gotten worse and i now need…wait for it….Bifocals.  WTF!!!??? So now my face has been subjected to jaw surgery, braces, more braces, impending jaw surgeries and now bifocals*!

Can I get any more dorky?! Maybe if I am lucky I will develop a case of severe acne.

My mother suggested we do Lasik surgery together.  If I do Lasik then I am buying myself a new nose.  For all the facial trauma I’m going through what’s one more? Besides my nose will feel left out if every other part of my face is harrased in some way and it’s still all bumpy and weird.

*on the plus side modern bifocals have an invisible line, so no one will know but me…but aren’t I the only one who matters!?!?! (yes, i understand what that sounds like, leave me alone).

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Themed by Hunson. Originally by Josh
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